We all make decisions every day, sometimes not realizing that each decision could potentially have a lasting impact on the rest of our lives. As a high school principal, parent and leader, I am constantly aware of all the choices I make each day. I also carefully watch the youth around me – my former students, my own children – as they struggle to learn how to navigate life’s moments of decision.
We can’t protect children from the curveballs that life will throw them, but as parents, educators and mentors, we can teach them how to react to them. When children are faced with challenges – fear, illness, parental divorce and temptation to engage in illegal or irresponsible activities – they need to be equipped with the tools and the resilience to respond to the challenges of adolescence and young adulthood.
This is especially true for children who live in high-risk neighborhoods or communities. We must give every young person the tools they need to succeed, and work to level the playing field by removing socioeconomic disparities.
How do we impart this crucial knowledge on youth? Easy – we lead by example. Children and young adults need teachers, mentors, parents and leaders in their lives to model responsible, empowered behavior. They need the bar to be set high, and be inspired to believe that they can achieve and win.
I currently serve as the head of school at Thomas Edison Charter School in Delaware, and prior to this role, I spent more than 20 years working in the Philadelphia School District. Like thousands of teachers and school administrators across the country, those of us who work in America’s largest cities face great challenges as we work to educate children who are poor, usually minority, and often labeled as disadvantaged.
Unfortunately, the debate often turns away from what is important – focusing on educating and preparing our youth to be successful – to a debate over the type of schools that students should be taught in – traditional public schools, public charter schools, private schools and so on.
Regardless of the type of school we work in, as school leaders we must learn and remember to listen to our teachers and students. Many students in our schools, especially those in areas of extreme poverty, make bad choices and life-altering decisions, in many cases, because they do not possess the self-efficacy beliefs that they need to succeed in school and life.
These students do not acquire these beliefs from their families, home environment, communities or schools. We need to motivate those around us to develop this concept of self-efficacy.
No matter what we do, we cannot prevent adversity from affecting our students, but we can teach them to be more resilient by remaining strong when they need us to be, and changing how they think about their challenges and adversities. Every child needs to know that they have the power to control their own destiny, and in turn, have a positive impact on the world around them.
Successful students eventually become contributing members of a well-prepared work force. As productive society members, many of these students, like me, can give back to their communities by mentoring other disadvantaged youth. This creates a wonderful cycle of educated, prepared and confident youth and community members.
Whether you are an educator, parent, mentor or business leader, you can have a profound impact on your community. Making the decision to positively influence a child’s life could be the most important thing you ever do, and the best decision you ever make. •
Salome Thomas-EL is head of school at Thomas Edison Charter in Wilmington, Del.
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