A new, young worker at a construction site sat down to eat his lunch with the rest of the crew. As an older fellow opened his thermos to pour out coffee, the young worker asks, “What’s that?”
The older fellow says, “It’s a thermos bottle.”
“What is it for?” the young worker asks.
“It keeps hot liquids hot and cold liquids cold,” the older fellow said.
The next day the young worker arrives at the construction site with his own thermos.
The older fellow asks, “Whatcha got in your thermos?”
“Two cups of hot coffee and a glass of cold iced tea,” said the young man.
“Communication does not begin with being understood, but with understanding others,” said W. Steven Brown, founder and chairman of the Fortune Group International.
Avoiding misunderstandings is fundamental to a successful workplace, not to mention life in general. If doing your job is important, you need to let people know what you’re doing, and you need to understand what they want from you.
Expressing yourself is vital, but understanding what others are telling you allows you to make your arguments more persuasive.
Not only is brevity the soul of wit, it is also a demonstration of respect for others’ time. Learn to make your points clearly and concisely.
So much of two-way communication depends on both sides feeling like they are not in hostile territory. Even when two parties disagree, getting rude and personal is never acceptable.
Body language often speaks louder than words.
Body language often speaks louder than words. Be aware of your hand gestures, eye contact, stance and tone of voice so you don’t undercut what you’re trying to say.
With so much of our communication written rather than spoken in person, don’t ignore the impact of texts, tweets, emails, posts and letters.
Messages committed to print are eternal, it seems, so it pays to read and reread what you are expressing before you hit the send button.
“Words have meaning beyond the obvious. Words have consequences beyond intention,” said John R. Dallas Jr., author of “We Need to Have a Word: Words of Wisdom, Courage and Patience for Work, Home and Everywhere.”
A simple combination of letters can change the course of progress. A poorly chosen phrase can end a working relationship – even if you didn’t mean what you said.
The Chinese philosopher Confucius is said to have once been asked his views on the importance of good communication in getting things done. “What,” asked the questioner, “is the first thing to be done if good work is to be accomplished?”
Confucius replied, “Getting the definitions right, using the right words.” He elaborated that “when words are improperly applied, issues are misunderstood. When issues are misunderstood, the wrong plans are devised. When the wrong plans are devised, wrong commands are given. When wrong commands are given, the wrong work is performed. When the wrong work is performed, organizations fail. When organizations fail, the people suffer.”
And so, he concluded, “The first thing is to achieve the proper naming of things.”
Here’s a joke to further illustrate my point.
Two men went into a diner and sat down at the counter. They ordered two sodas, took sandwiches out of their packs and started to eat them. The owner saw what was going on and approached the men.
“You can’t eat your own sandwiches in here,” he complained.
So, the two men stopped, looked at each other and then swapped their sandwiches.
Mackay’s Moral: It is wiser to choose what you say than to say what you choose.
Harvey Mackay is the author of the New York Times best-seller “Swim With the Sharks Without Being Eaten Alive.” He can be reached through his website, www.harveymackay.com.
